You know what the worst feeling is?
It’s looking into your little girl’s red, watery eyes while she hyperventilates, trying to gather enough strength to say, ‘Bye, I love you,’ as her mother takes her away.
Last night, I was watching my oldest daughter’s talent show with my little one. And before it was even over, she was already in tears.
She knew I’d be leaving soon.
I live an hour and a half away — not by choice. Their mother moved them after we separated.
Now, I only see them at certain events or for my weekends.
It’s been four years of this.
And every time I have to say goodbye, it rips me apart. Even I have a hard time keeping it together sometimes.
But there was something about last night that will stay with me forever.
After the talent show, I took my daughters out to eat. We hung out for a little and it was great.
Then came the time to leave, and my youngest broke down.
I tried to comfort her, but it wasn’t enough.
While saying goodbye, my oldest clung to my leg when I tried handing my youngest to her mother.
As they walked away, my youngest looked back at me. Tears were streaming down her face. And as she tried to catch her breath, she struggled to say, ‘Bye, Daddy. I love you.’
It fucking crushed me.
I got in the car for the long ride home and couldn’t help but break down.
You see, I didn’t sign up to be a part-time parent.
The day I found out I was going to be a dad, I promised I’d give my girls the life they deserve.
And this? This isn’t it.
They don’t deserve this. No child does.
Kids are innocent.
They shouldn’t be caught in the middle or have to carry the burden for our mistakes.
I understand that sometimes separation is inevitable. But too often, that’s not the case. It’s selfish decisions where kids aren’t put first.
And they’re the ones who pay.
Watching my daughters go through this week after week is heartbreaking.
They’re young. They’re trying to figure out their place in the world.
The last thing they need is to be torn between two homes, trying to understand what the hell is going on with their family.
They need stability, not confusion.
And what makes it worse: Society normalizes this.
We act like this is just a part of life. But it’s not. This isn’t normal. And it doesn’t have to be.
We’re choosing this.
This situation should be the exception, not the norm. But now it’s becoming the majority.
And it’s wrong.
We’re hurting these kids.
Let’s stop pretending this is okay. It’s not.
If you want to know what’s wrong with kids today, just look around. We can’t even get our own shit together.
We owe it to our kids to do better.
This is on us.
